Grandparents & Dementia: Common Questions from Children - DementiaGuide.com Posted on June 13, 2008 by DementiaGuide Grandparents and Dementia In a world where people are living longer every year, our children have the opportunity to learn a great deal from their grandparents, and may enjoy loving relationships with them for many years. There is also the possibility our children will have to cope with understanding why grandparents and dementia often go hand-in-hand. When a parent is diagnosed with dementia, it can be frightening to face the unknown, even as an adult. For children and teens, separating their love for their grandparents and their anger and confusion regarding dementia can be difficult. Children and teens may ask questions about why their grandparent is acting strangely or doesn't respond to them like he or she did in the past. Honesty is the best way to handle these sorts of questions. Here are some common examples: "Is Gramdpa crazy?" is a frequent question you can answer simply. No, Grandpa isn't crazy, he has an illness affecting the way he thinks. It isn't contagious and he can't help the way he feels or the way he is acting. We need to be patient and understanding, as this is something he can't control. "Does Grandma still love me?" is a worry for many children. Reassure them that grandparents with dementia continue to love them in their hearts, even if their minds do not always recognize them. Encourage Simple Interaction When the worlds of active grandparents and dementia collide, grandchildren can feel like they have lost cherished friends, as grandparents today are often very active in the lives of their grandchildren. Talk to your children and discover new ways for them to maintain a loving bond with their grandparents after dementia has been diagnosed. Trips to the mall or unsupervised hikes may no longer be possible, but listening to music together, sharing a snack each afternoon, and looking through photo albums are all good ways for grandparents and grandchildren to maintain their bond. If a grandparent with dementia is living with you, children can engage in a daily activity like reading a short book to the grandparent or sitting with him or her and watching a favorite television program. Open communication, honest answers, and learning new ways to maintain loving relationships can ensure that grandparents with dementia can continue to play a role in the lives of their grandchildren.